agonyaunt | Jul. 11th, 2024

Jul. 11th, 2024

DEAR ABBY: I met this man online a year and a half ago. We have been together ever since. There is a serious problem with him watching porn. When we met, I knew he was doing it when I was not with him. He knows I'm not happy about it, and he tried for a while to keep it hidden from me. More recently, he would watch it and then want to come get cozy with me.

When I tell him it's a complete turnoff for me, he gets upset and tells me I need to see a therapist to get over it. I told him he should get help if he expects to have a relationship with any woman. I think he's obsessed with pornography. Am I overreacting?

I'm beginning to feel like it is more important for him to watch porn than spend time with me. I do love him and very much want to be with him, but I can't seem to get over this. Help, please. -- DEAL-BREAKER IN PENNSYLVANIA

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conuly

DEAR ABBY: I was married to a wonderful woman for 27 happy years until she passed last year. We did everything together. Now I feel lonely and depressed. We had a sweet furry guy named Maxx who was our whole world. I lost Maxx a few months ago, and I am devastated.

I'm a very hardworking man. After losing my family, I feel lifeless -- like the life has been sucked out of my body. My co-workers tell me I need to start dating and move on. It's not that easy. Is this normal?

I have been attending grief therapy, but it doesn't seem to be working. I tried joining a dating site but it's a disaster out there. Most of the women are gold diggers or interested only in hookups. I like only curvy ladies. I don't think I'm ever going to find someone intelligent or reasonable. What do you suggest? -- OUT OF SORTS IN OREGON

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conuly

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1. DEAR ABBY: We have five grandchildren. All but one call me MeeMaw. I've been MeeMaw since my first grandchild was born 15 years ago. Four years ago, our third grandchild was born, and the fourth arrived the next month. This fourth grandchild was calling me MeeMaw until one day when she started calling me MeeMawMeeMaw, which my child's spouse told me "started out of the blue."

It soon became apparent this grandchild was being told to do it. This is the first grandchild for her other grandmother, who has decided she is going to be called MeeMaw and I would not be.

At first, I tried to let it go, but as time goes on, it's really bothering me. It would have been fine for us both to be MeeMaw, but I think it's wrong for someone to tell my grandchild they can't call me what I've been called for many years and what all my other grandchildren call me.

I don't want to cause problems, but this is causing me great stress. What should I do, or how can I get through this? I have been given a nickname that I didn't ask for and that I don't like. -- RENAMED IN NEW ENGLAND

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2. DEAR ABBY: My daughter is graduating from college with a bachelor's degree -- a proud moment. I am divorced from her mother. Both her mother and I are invited to attend the ceremony, but she has not invited my current wife, whom she doesn't like. She has stated that she has only a limited number of tickets and wants to invite her mom's close relatives.

This has put me in an uncomfortable position, as my wife feels left out and aggrieved. I can either insist to my daughter that she has to invite my wife or I won't attend, or I can go, insisting to my wife that this is a significant moment in my daughter's life and I need to be there. What should I do? -- CONFLICTED IN CALIFORNIA

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conuly

DEAR ABBY: We adopted our daughter, "Opal," at the age of 2. She is 6 now. Opal lived with us off and on as a newborn, but by age 1, she lived permanently with us. We live in a small community, so everyone knows everyone. Opal lived with her biological mom prior to adoption.

We tried to allow interaction between them with certain rules in place. However, Opal was recently permitted to spend two hours with her biological mother at a party for a sibling. Opal asked to come back home, so she was dropped off. I later found out her bio mom told her she gave birth to her so SHE is her REAL mother.

We never hid the adoption from Opal. We speak about it in a way that isn't negative or hurtful. Since this happened, Opal has reverted to being clingy and wakes up with that conversation on her mind. How do I address this with her bio mom and with our daughter? -- REALLY MOM IN KENTUCKY

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Agony Aunt

Jul. 11th, 2024

Jul. 11th, 2024

(no subject)

More issues than a comic book....

Two letters to Abby about people making mountains out of molehills

Did Abby even read this letter?

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