Dear Amy: Women today have been empowered to act and speak out against sexual harassment, bullying, rape, etc. This is a major milestone.

However, over the past few years I have observed the lack of traditional manners toward women by men. I notice husbands and male partners pushing through doors before their wives and dates (instead of holding doors open). I see them seating themselves in restaurants before their dates and wives have been seated.

Along with the gains that women have made, have they also lost the benefit of traditional manners and male deference?

— Wondering

Wondering: No woman I know gives a whit about traditional manners and male deference. We DO want to be treated “nicely,” however.

For instance, it would be “nice” to make the same wage for the same work. It would also be nice not to be raped, assaulted, harassed, catcalled, bullied, objectified or fearful.

Kind and loving people (no matter the gender) demonstrate their consideration by being polite, deferential, kind and courteous toward one another. We women can seat ourselves at the table, open the door for ourselves — and are happy to hold it open for anyone else.